My Orgasmic Hypnosis Journey
You read that correctly.
Hi besties,
I can only imagine how devastated you all were last week when I didn’t send out my newsletter. I know that your week revolves around this newsletter, and this newsletter only. And I am so sorry that I failed you.
On a serious note, my newsletter this week is going to be a little bit different. It reads more like a diary entry and less like a “how-to-better-yourself” guide. In full transparency, I just want to share a recap of the last few days with you all. And I hope that, if anything, you find it entertaining.
As you all probably know, I’m in Tulum. And if you follow me on Instagram, you definitely know I’m in Tulum. This is my first vacation with someone who actually knows how to take pictures of me - so let me live. I also packed too many cute outfits to let them go unseen. What you haven't seen via my highly curated Instagram are the other little moments that have been really transformative for me while I’ve been here. The moments that have given me a lot to think about.
You also haven’t seen footage of me and Rachel catching a stomach bug - but that’s better left unseen.
I booked this trip for the same reasons anyone goes on vacation. To get away and have fun. But I came to Tulum, specifically, because of how spiritual it is here. I came to reground myself because I've been so wrapped up in bullshit lately. The caring-what-people-think bullshit. The comparing-myself-to-others bullshit. The imposter-syndrome bullshit. Essentially, I haven’t been practicing what I preach very well. And I felt a little lost.
My mom always nags me because my solution to everything is escaping reality. But what I’ve come to realize throughout this trip is that maybe escaping reality is okay sometimes. And maybe it doesn’t necessarily have to look like catching a flight.
In the spirit of grounding myself, I wanted to go all out on the spiritual, woo-woo shit Tulum has to offer. So I signed up for not one, but two hypnosis classes at a spiritual retreat when I got here. One of them was titled “Orgasmic Hypnosis.” And I’m going to be totally honest here. It was as weird as it sounds.
My two hypnosis experiences were drastically different for me. The theme of the first class was around letting go. Everyone in the room went around and said one thing they wanted to release. And under the instruction and guidance of David - the sweet hypnosis teacher and my new friend - we were guided to think of symbols and imagery that helped us let go of what no longer served us. For example, one woman wanted to let go of fear. She was told to envision fear in front of her (whatever that looked like), tie that tangible object up to a million balloons, and watch the fear float upwards and dissolve. She was screaming and crying the entire time. Which in turn made me cry the entire time. The energy I felt while hypnotized is really hard to describe. My entire body was tingling and would randomly convulse. And it almost felt like other people’s emotions were my own. David later explained that when you’re in this trance state, you feel empathy very intensely. Because I’m already a very empathetic person, it wasn’t shocking that I cried for the entire hour of class.
Now onto the orgasm class.
Side note: I absolutely love that my mom and my coworkers are reading this. Not.
Anyways, the class was essentially a straight hour of dirty talk surrounded by random, moaning strangers. I felt like I was in a weird porn simulation. Except the dirty talk wasn’t really erotic. It was symbolic. So we were envisioning flowers (opening up), and water (filling us up), and gold liquid (oozing out). Okay, so, semi-erotic? I also want to mention that everyone in the room was laying next to their significant other. And there I was, next to Rachel. A bonding moment for us, indeed. There was a lot of noise. A lot of deep breathing. A lot of panting. And then there were occasional bursts of laughter. (It was me - I was the only one laughing).
You’re probably wondering why the fuck I would ever sign up for something like this. And initially - it was strictly for newsletter content. But the reason I decided to go to David’s class a second time is because I thoroughly enjoyed the experience. I think there is so much we can learn from hypnosis.
Getting hypnotized puts you into a trance. And apparently, so does masturbation. David explained that one of the purest forms of being in a trance is the journey leading up to orgasm when you masturbate. He tries to emulate that state of trance and pleasure in his classes. Essentially, your conscious mind shuts off when you’re in a trance. You’re not thinking about what you want to eat later. You’re not thinking about how stressful work is. You’re not thinking about anything other than what the instructor is telling you to think about.
David helps people reprogram their subconscious minds to let go of what no longer serves them. He also helps people associate feelings of pleasure with goals they want to achieve. We typically associate pain with achieving our goals; we know the work it’ll take to get to where we want to be and we dread it. For example, David works with addicts by helping them reprogram their minds to associate the journey towards getting clean with pleasure instead of pain. He also uses this type of hypnosis to help people with genital mutilation experience an orgasm from touching their earlobes or stroking their hand. It sounds insane. And trust me, it sounded just as insane to me too until I experienced it. The “orgasm” he guided us towards wasn’t necessarily genital - although I think the man next to me would beg to differ. I felt a full body high and a head rush. My hands and feet were tingling. My body felt so relaxed and at peace. It was truly unreal. It felt very euphoric.
Doing something that brings us clarity and turns off our minds is so powerful. That’s when we’re the most creative. That’s when we become more grounded. Hypnosis was pretty much an hour of guided meditation. Just a lot more entertaining. But as I said before, you don’t have to be hypnotized to be in a trance. According to David, you can be in trance when you fall in love. Or when you take MDMA. Or when you go to a rave. And because the first two options were off the table for me and Rachel (involuntarily and voluntarily), we did the latter.
What better way to rave in Mexico than getting picked up by a van in a supermarket parking lot to go to a jungle party in a “secret location.” Before you come at me for being an idiot - it sounds a lot more sketchy than it actually was. The van was full of travelers our age ready to party. The “secret location” was a ranch 15 minutes outside of the city. It was honestly a fantastic night. And I’m still here to tell the tale! We also went to a Full Moon Party the night after, which I can easily say was one of the coolest experiences of my life.
My takeaway here - the one I hope lands with some of you - is that I actually think we should all try to escape reality more often. Being in a trance and shutting off your mind doesn’t have to look like attending a rave or an orgasmic hypnosis class. It doesn’t have to look like booking a flight somewhere. Those states of trance that tune out the thoughts and anxieties that unfortunately exist in our realities (unless we’re truly enlightened individuals) can look like anything. Meditation and masturbation are drastically different - but they both get the job done. To clarify, the job I’m referring to here is shutting off your mind. ;)
Honestly, writing this newsletter puts me into a trance. Maybe for you, it looks like running or painting or playing an instrument. Whatever it is, find the things that allow you to escape from the day-to-day bullshit we often get so caught up in. And make time for those parts of life that bring you pleasure and help silence your mind for even a few minutes. Because the moments where your conscious mind shuts the fuck up for once are the moments where I truly believe you’ll find the most clarity.
P.S. if any of you want to fall in love, lmk.
-Stella
Me, I wanna fall in love!!!
Wait I wanna go next time haha